You measure distance in minutes.

You’ve ever had to switch from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day. (Today, yesterday, tomorrow...)

You use “fix” as a verb. Example: “I’m fixing to go to the store

All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.

You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked. (EVERYONE does!)

You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday

You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit “a little warm”.

You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, still Summer and Christmas.

You know whether another Tennessean is from east, west or middle Tennessee as soon as they open their mouth.

Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as ”goin’ Wal-martin” or off to “Wally World”.

You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good pinto-bean weather.

Fried catfish is the other white meat.

There are 5,000 types of snakes, and 4,998 live in
Tennessee.

There are 10,000 types of snakes- 10,003 live in Tennessee.

You've never met any celebrities -- other than Fred Thompson.

"Vacation" means going to the family reunion.

You laugh when people from anywhere north of Tennessee try to say or spell "y'all."

It's "Mar-vull," not "Mary-ville."

It's "Knox-vull," not "Knox-ville."

You butter your hot biscuit by cutting it open, putting a slab of butter inside, and closing it back up again.

Pigeon Forge is not pronounced with a French accent.

Gatlinburg does have an "L" in it and it should be pronounced.

You shop at Wal-Mart for groceries, not at a grocery store.

You don't drive in Knoxville on game day. EVER.

You or your friends chew.

Snow? What's that?

You know when Elvis Presley Day is.

You know all of the words to "Rocky Top."

You avoid going anywhere near Bristol Motor Speedway on race weekend.

You know it's worth it driving to Alabama just to save 1.25% on the sales tax. (We have a TEN percent sales tax!!!)

You eat "dinner" at noon and "supper" in the evening.

Your Wal-Mart has specific parking spots for horses and buggies.

You use "commode" in conversations and absolutely no one knows what you're talking about.

You know how to do the watermelon crawl. ( XD )

Everything is COKE, and if you don't like it, tough. Ex: "You want a COKE?" "Sure." "Which kind?" "Dr. Pepper."

You're in a fur jacket one day, shorts the next, and no one thinks anything about it.

Everyone you know owns a truck, and at least one of those trucks is just painted with primer or more colors than the rainbow.

You drive through a rich neighborhood just to see the wannabe redneck kids with their brand-new Fords and their designer holey jeans and cowboy hats.

Boomsday in Knoxville is equal to New Year's Eve at Times Square. (Fuck yeah!)

Knoxville becomes the third largest city every Saturday in the fall.

Sweet tea is THE DRINK...no questions, no exceptions. Most people from Tennessee begin drinking sweet tea even before they can drink out of sippy cups. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar! (Mmmmm, x3 )

When you concede that while the sky might be Carolina blue, the grass is "sure enough" always Tennessee green